Fortunately, we’re mayor-free today.

• Four hundred fifty words on the gender complexities of reggaeton. Whatever, it still sucks. [Reggeatona]
• A Hispanic, U.S. Army soldier who was supposed to go to Iraq today robbed a store in his uniform. We’d say that’s dumb, but actually, it’s kind of smart. [KRGV TV 5]
• Win a copy of Build This Bong. What? You need to hear more? [SFist]
• Unfathomably Unshocking Revelation: 2/3 of construction jobs last year were filled by hispanics [Hispanic Tips]
• Eva and Tony “couldn’t be closer to heaven” which means we couldn’t be closer to joining the Church of Satan. [Pop Sugar]
• For those who like tetas. We salute you. [TMZ]