Presenting J. Lo And Marc Anthony, the Untold Story
24 July 2007, 12:42 PM. By Carlos Posas
We stumbled across this doctored image today, and couldn’t help but dream up an alternate history for the pictured couple. One where neither J. Lo nor Marc Anthony signed the pact with the devil that launched them from the Fly Girls and Menudo, respectively, into super-stardom. One where the Latino media didn’t portray them as the overblown success story they are today, but as a cautionary tale for young Hispanics clamoring to get into the entertainment industry. Hell, how ’bout a history where they spared us from “Waiting For Tonight” and “I Need To Know”? Obese J. Lo and chubby Marc Anthony can at least take comfort in the fact that they’d be happier with their humble lot in life than their skinny, rich counterparts. On second thought, maybe not. They are Puerto Rican, after all. (That one goes out to you, Lemuel Soto!)
[Ed. Note: Hats off to tipster Daniela for the pic.]
Image [Planet Hiltron]
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If J.Lo gets wind of this, she’ll make lemonade from the lemons & buy the rights to that Mama Cass biopic. Hey, she played Selena when she’s not, in fact, Mexican (Cholos were encensed at the degradation of a Puerto Rican playing their idol, no?), so why not pack on a hundred pounds & portray Cass? It worked for De Niro as La Motta.
Wow. Let that be a reminder to Ms. Lopez that she’s only a lechon asado con mofongo away from turning into planet JLo.
We posted this photo of a chubby J-Lo last month, sniff.
Seriously, I can’t tell you just how much I love this photo. I may post it again.
Planet J-Lo, that’s funny.
Hilarious!