Yesterday, we pointed out how Fox News looked for the silver lining in Census reports of a Latino New World Order. Today, we note USA Today’s treatment of the way “rapidly growing numbers of” Hispanics are “fanning out” eastward before “settling in” like a swarm of goddamn cockroaches. They bring in an expert to explain the nature of this invasion:

“We’re seeing new immigrant minorities coming in to areas that haven’t had very much minority populations or immigrant populations,” says William Frey, demographer at the Brookings Institution. “It put immigration on the front burner politically. It scared a lot of people.”

(If they’re scared now, wait ‘til these folks in suburban Atlanta, Chicago, and D.C. see what the Hispanics have in store for their taste in music!) Much like the experts in Denver did, demographer Kenneth Johnson blames the high birthrate among Hispanics for thrusting us onto the verge of apocalypse:

“It’s affecting school budgets and creating new needs that impinge directly on local taxpayers,” he says. “How will the newcomers in these non-traditional gateways be transformed into productive workers and taxpayers? … The frictions will be most palpable at the local level.”

You heard it here first, readers—the only way to stem this brown tide is to turn its people into hump-busting, tax-paying stiffs like the rest of us. But the friction along the way might cost some jobs, maybe even some parking spaces. (We never said it was going to be pretty.) That’s the kind of sacrifice we have to be willing to make, or the terrorists will have won. Or something like that. It’s hard to keep up with all the rhetoric being flung around these days.

Hispanic growth extends eastward [USA Today]
Image [Google]