While obsessed American talk show viewers worship no idols before Oprah, it almost goes unsaid that Latino ones worship at the altar of Cristina. She’s the impossibly blonde TV icon who invited Noelia onto her eponymous show for an episode that aired last night. (We would’ve watched it ourselves, but Eddie Murphy’s “Raw” was on. So sue us.) The publicity stunt event garnered a simple headline from blog Latino Gossip—“Noelia, The Porn Star, Cries on Cristina”—whose choice of words sparked a small handful of comments worth highlighting. Carol gets the pity party off to a sanctimonious start:

I think everything she said is true […] So what if she made a sex video with an ex-boyfriend [sic] more low are the people that released it.

Right on! Low like the people who exploit the instant fame it brings them. What’s that, Zuquita? Noelia’s a helpless victim in all of this? (Her comment follows the jump.)

She had every right to enjoy her sexuality like everyone else and have a fantasy with her boyfriend that was something private that should’nt [sic] be release. [sic] She is not profiting from it. Other people are.

Riiight. Since it’s her talent that’s put her in such high demand these days. Always saving the best for last, we conclude with what the one male on the board had to say—[sic] implied throughout:

She’s a hoe and takes a D*ck like a champ! nasty pu**y . What a slut she’s got a roast beef open sandwhich down there. Nasty

Your honor, we present Exhibit X as to why teenage boys should not be allowed on the internet. At least until they can spell ‘sandwich’ properly.

Noelia, the Porn Star, Cries On Cristina [Latino Gossip]