Nature Vs. Nurture Both Result In No Talent For Nicole Richie

We’ve kinda sorta heard rumors to the effect that Nicole Richie, socialite, author, tv-personality, drug enthusiast, and now, soon-to-be mommy has some fiery Latina blood running through her heroin-soaked veins. But she rarely talks about her birth parents, most likely because they totally abandoned her in the very posh home of 80’s music legend Lionel Richie when she was but two years old. Through some crack journalism, however, [Ed. Note: Uh, emphasis on the crack], we discovered the rumor is that girlfriend’s daddy is none other than Pete Escovedo Jr. (pictured at right), legendary Afro-Latino percussionist (more cowbell please) who not only toured for Santana but also for Lionel Richie in the 70’s and 80’s. (“All Night Long” conga solo, perhaps?)

The legend is that Pedrito hooked up with a Richie wardrobe assistant who still remains anonymous and Nicole Camille Escovedo was born. At some point, Pete ran into some financial trouble and Nicole was sent to live with (apparently) good friend and godfather of sorts Lionel Richie and his then wife Brenda Harvey-Richie. The couple eventually adopted her when she was nine years old. Right before they divorced. Whoops.

Turns out this would also make Sheila E. her tía if Wikipedia is to be believed. Of course, Richie denied all these allegations in a 2005 CNN interview, but as is usually the case in these celebrity spec pieces, that hardly carries much weight here. To that end, check out this video of the musically enhanced portion of the family getting down with Tito Puente back in the day. Paul Escovedo is on the left and Sheila E. center:

So the lesson here is that if you are going to have a kid and be all irresponsible please drop that kid off in some rich neighborhood. Chances are they’ll turn out to be just fine even if their emotional scars are so deep that they can’t retain any of your or their new daddy’s musical talent.