QuieroLatino.com is a dating site for Latinos that understands finding love is a pretty difficult process without the aid of shot or seven of tequila, but harder still when one is trying to find a worthy beaner with which to share one’s life and futon. Because, let’s face it, most beaners are pretty worthless. At least, according to one ethnically eligible couple who took a fancy to the site:

My wife and I were watching one of those dating shows and she commented that it must be hard for college educated, middle class Latinos to make a real love connection.

She reasoned that given the cold and transient corporate climate, it seems almost impossible to meet ethnically eligible people who share the same socio cultural background. My wife is a successful Latina business owner; I am a part time University Professor and full time Insultant.

Insultant? Wait. That’s our job.

And to think, all this time we’ve been trying to pick up our other half the entirely wrong way. We should judge people not by the content of their character, but by the contents of their wallet. And their ability to name any subsequent esquintles in a socially acceptable manner:

I am cognizant of the fact that we live in an increasingly post-ethnic society. In the corporate culture, Latinos interact and couple up with peers, just like everyone else. This is how we end up with kids named Qualtemoc Shaffer, Brie Bedoya, and Raindrop Chorizo. But what about those of us who want a girl just like the girl that married dear old Dad? Or a woman who wants a man like Papa without the porky Panza?

We’re not sure little Raindrop Chorizo is so much the result of this supposed post-ethnic society we live in as much as the result of living in a post-intelligent society. In any case, stop looking for the love of your life with your heart, cretins, and prepare yourselves for long hours spent in the romantic glow of your computer monitors.

Their impressive credentials beg the question, “What do they know about romance, when many Latinos found the loves of their lives at House Party’s, Baptismos, Funerals and Traffic school?”

Actually, we prefer to meet people the way Papa Dios intended: the next morning.

Hooking up while Hispanic [Electronic Aztlan]