Eva Longoria Opens Restaurant, Should Learn To Stick A Fork In It

“Desperate Housewives” star Eva Longoria is opening a restaurant called BESO, which is Spanish for -overpriced shit- kiss. Cute!:

“I love to cook!” Longoria, 32, told PEOPLE at an event Wednesday night. “I’m a big, big cooker in my family, so this is kind of an extension of my house. I feel like everybody’s going to be in my living room,” she added.

She’s such a comedian, that Eva. Yeah, we like to cook too! The things we can do with a bit of cough syrup and a sprinkle of battery acid would blow your mind.

Hollywood’s Latest Restaurateur [Lossip]