Inflation: What’s it all about? Costlier Drugs.

We don’t drive here in the Big Apple so we couldn’t care less about you schmucks paying $3.00 a gallon for gasoline, but when we hear that the price of crystal has gone up 87%! And cocaine up 47 per cent? Well it makes us want to take to the streets. To buy up all the drugs before they run out, that is.

Prices for cocaine and methamphetamine have risen for the fourth quarter in a row, a trend law enforcement officials say indicates supply has dropped.

“I don’t think anyone is prepared to declare victory, but this is certainly encouraging news,” says Scott Burns of the Office of National Drug Control Policy.

In light of the myriad of ways our economy has taken a blow, as it were, we here at Guanabee regret to inform you that our new policy will be a subscription-only readership. For a mere $200, you can continue to read our words of wit and…Oh, wait. What?

Price increases don’t necessarily show government success, says Bill Piper, a spokesman for the Drug Policy Alliance, which supports legalizing drugs. “When gasoline prices go up, politicians instinctively know that oil companies are getting rich,” Piper says. “When drug prices go up, drug cartels are making money. … More people are going to enter the market because its [sic] more profitable.”

Oh, never mind what we said before. Just say no, kids! And stay in school. Now back to our regular (and free!) scheduled program.

Price of illegal drugs continues to increase [USA Today]