You Got Some 'Splaining To Do: About Brown People And Their Pets
The news that some loft-dwelling, jackhole Manhattanite was willing to shell out $10,000 for his stupid dog got us thinking about our own pets and… where they might have run off to. If you’ve ever driven through certain predominantly Latino neighborhoods like, say, Westchester or La Souwesera in Miami, you have probably noticed old shirtless men washing their cars as two or six or fifteen assorted mutts look on. It’s not that these shirtless old men don’t love their dogs, they do, but they just don’t feel the need to dress them in tutus and feed them Kaviar ‘n Bits like a lot of white folks are wont to do. This goes for real dogs, like labs and German Shepherds and mutts with three legs and no ears. Not Yorkies and Llasa Apsos, which are more like “delicious.” Our dogs usually eat leftover arroz con moros, banana peels, lizards, mice and old condoms.
They travel in packs of two or three around the neighborhood, looking skinny and mean. They sleep in cement driveways or under your (shirtless, obsessive car-washing) abuelo’s pickup truck and swat flies with their ears and tails. They don’t sleep in miniature canopy beds with painted toenails. And you know why? Because their role is to protect and serve, not pose for family Christmas photos or “World’s Cutest Puppy!” coffee mugs. We love our dogs, truly, we do. All seventeen of them.
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- Managing Editor
Daniel Mauser
- Editor
Cindy Casares
- Associate Editor
Alex Alvarez
- Contributing Editors
Gabriel Caro - Camilla Rowan
- Video Editor
Marcelo Cunning
guacala! eating condoms, funny and true.
Posted by dancecontestwinner | November 07, 2007
This is totally true. Growing up in Mexico our dogs used to dogs, here they are people. At least they are more amiable than a lot of people I know.
Posted by Tromelio | November 07, 2007
Yeah, WTF-why is my dog always sniffing out the garbage for my rubbers? If a dog had any shame, I’d make him wear one on each paw next time it rained. If he was really bad, they’d be used.
Posted by My Favorite Squadron | November 07, 2007
I felt really bad dropping my dog off at the kennel when I went down to DF to visit my tia. After a couple days I stopped feeling bad after I realized the kennel was a 4 star hotel compared to how the dogs lived down there. They just roam around freely eating garbage (there ain’t no such thing as leftovers in that neck of the woods). My cousin told me at night the dog catchers come and get as many as they can and take them to the local dump and toss them in to the incinerator. It’s pretty damn hard.. but my dog probably eats better than my family down there does.
Posted by pepelicious | November 07, 2007
One more funny story: I lived in an snooty middle class town for a few years and got used to picking up my dog’s poo with a plastic bag when I took him for walks (there was a city ordinance). About a year ago I moved to a more..eh, diverse… neighborhood where I got stares for just walking my dog and double stares for picking up his poop and carrying it around in a bag. Some cochino gringo looking guy (i’m half and half) walking down the street with a bag of dog shit… that’s me.
Posted by pepelicious | November 07, 2007
I live in La Sawesera, and we even have a real life San Lazaro. He has about 7 dogs and wanders the neighborhood w/ a huge bad of dog food in his shopping cart.
Posted by E-LE-NA | November 07, 2007