Culture

You Got Some 'Splaining To Do: Why Do Latinos Kiss Hello?

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Guanabee Staff

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kiss12.5.07.jpg It wasn’t until we left to the Northeast for college that we realized kissing hello can really weird some people out. Why do Latinos do this? Perhaps it’s because we are such a spicy people. Or maybe we come from a culture where people are, on the whole, more immediately intimate with one another. Or maybe we just like leaving our lipstick on your cheek, asshole. Whatever the case, we’ve grown up with everyone from young guys to old women laying one on us as a way of saying both hello and good-bye. "Hi!" he says brightly, the space between you rapidly diminishing as he makes his way across the room. You fiddle with the pre-frayed ends of your vertically integrated, organic cotton tunic and smile nervously. "Hi," you croak in response. His face is now inches from yours. You lean in, pucker your lips and... "Uh. Hehe. Whoa. What?" He chuckles nervously and takes a step back. Shit. Why this reaction? Had you forgotten to floss? Did you have pit stains? Did he notice your cold sore? You look down and see... his hand. Extended. Anticipating a handshake. Curses! Foiled again by The Gringo Shake! In our personal experiences with hello kisses and their resulting awkwardness, these greetings don’t involve actual lip-to-skin contact but, rather, are more of a cheek-to-cheek kind of deal. Which sometimes leaves us in awkward situations when we’re greeted by a Spaniard or someone of South American descent, who sometimes try to trip us up with a double, and sometimes triple, kiss. So we're wondering. Do you kiss hello? Do your non-Latino friends ever get freaked out when you lean in for a smooch? And how many times do you kiss: one cheek? Twice? Three times in rapid succession, like some sort of horrible Eurotrash douchenozzle? Also, do you ever throw a little ear nibble in for good measure? Not that we do that. Ever. Maybe.

What do you think?

  • LOL
  • CHISPAS
  • AY DIOS MIO
  • QUE CUTE
  • NERDO
  • NACO
  • CURSI
  • QUE COOL
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Comments

  • View Guest's profile Guest December 4, 2009

    I live in Canada and since it is a mix of cultures, some seem to do it. I got it a lot from Serbian relatives when I was a kid, which I hated and always pushed my head down so their stinky old person breath would hit my hair. As an adult I find it VERY inappropriate to even get near my head. Hug at the most but don't turn towards each other, and not if it's a stranger or someone you just met. Then it is a handshake. The kiss hello to me feels like a creepy stranger coming up and groping my boob or something just as terrible. Some people do it so fast or rapidly and that makes it even worse. My reaction is to coil back in horror. I find the handhake a bit formal too, so really I don't do that with close friends, I just do nothing physical and say hi, or if they are a 'hugger' then I'll follow suit. The thought of trading germs with someone is really disgusting to me.

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