Hillary Clinton Eats Hot Peppers, Will Never Die

This morning on CNN, TV doctor/shill Sanjay Gupta looked over the presidential candidates’ personal health records. What did we learn? The Republicans are very old & formerly skin-cancery (McCain) formerly fat and type two diabetic (Huckabee) and have already taken 16 years off their life by being a dirty, nasty smoker! (Obama-He’s chewing the gum now. Whatever.) But Hilla the Killa from Manilla is sickness free and always has been. Really. Straight from Dr. Sanjay’s mouth. She is the healthiest candidate by far and she blames it all on her love of hot peppers. Says the New York Times:

“I eat a lot of hot peppers,’’ she told CBS News anchor Katie Couric, who had asked her how she maintains her stamina on the campaign trail. “I for some reason started doing that in 1992, and I swear by it. I think it keeps my metabolism revved up and keeps me healthy.”

Lest you think this is a crock of shit, scientists have in fact been studying the effects of hot peppers on the body for a number of years since they realized indigenous peoples of South America look fabulous far into their 80’s, even as they are running around the mountains barefoot:

For starters, peppers contain several important nutrients, including beta-carotene, lutein, zeaxanthin and vitamin C, said Jonny Bowden, a board-certified nutritionist and author of “The 150 Healthiest Foods on Earth.’’ In fact, peppers contain about twice the amount of vitamin C found in citrus fruits, which may help explain why they have emerged as a popular home remedy for fighting colds.

Perhaps Mrs. Clinton has more in common with Mexicanos originally presumed?

Hillary’s Health Plan: Hot Peppers [New York Times]