The Top Ten Ways They Celebrate Easter In Oakland

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Our friend Al Carlos Hernandez is back with a list of the top ten ways they celebrate the resurrection of chocolate Jesus in Oaktown. Sorry if you’re Jewish, but no one sent us any Purim lists this week.

TOP Ten ways we celebrate Easter in Oakland

10.Everybody goes to church wearing their going to court clothes.

9. Easter Egg and biological Daddy hunt at Lake Merritt.

8. Rabbit stew.

7. Matching glove and handbag sale (see # 8)

6. Baptist women with big hats, homeboys put down their Gats.

5. Baskets include Wic coupons for block cheese.

4. TOP fans make their kids decorate eggs to look like favorite band members.

3. North Oakland Yuppies confuse Easter with Aunt Ester.

2. Offical start of “Who makes the best potato salad” season.

1. Oakland Raiders practice losing egg toss contests.

On the real Happy Easter, He has risen indeed.