A new TV documentary in England reveals that Heather Mills was, like every other person ever, once a prostitute. At least she didn’t have access to Movable Type:

Kinky ex-call girl Denise Hewitt says she and Lady Mucca acted out sizzling lesbian fantasies for their rich clients because they knew it would turn them on.

And she alleges that, as well as the massive fee, they would receive “extras” including designer jewellery and even cars if they satisfied their sugar daddies with their girl-on-girl bedroom romps.

Wouldn’t they be “johns” and not “sugar daddies?” A sugar daddy buys you expensive ravioli at Dumont and takes you to museums. A john pays you to have sex with another girl. A sugar daddy would only suggest that, gently.

The 44-year-old former model says: “We have a naughty background. We went into high-class prostitution behind closed doors.

“There were 10 of us. We are select girls from Newcastle and we kept it close-knit with three of the most powerful men in the world.”

The men she names include the late Australian tycoon Kerry Packer and one of the Saudi royal princes.

“They were the big fish,” says Denise. “We also had others who were classed as sugar daddies.

Packer! Fish! LOLZ! Also, not for nothing, but the author of this original article is named “Peter Dyke.” Twitter out loud!

MUCCA’S £10K LESBIAN ROMP [Daily Star]