Hi ladies! Quick question: Are your ovaries keeping you up at night with their plaintive whimpering? Or is that sin vergüenza you’re dating keeping you up? Well, good news! You can make your own god damn little hobbit-monster without a man using your own bone marrow. Scientists in Britain have found a way to turn female marrow into sperm. We knew we had it in us:

The breakthrough paves the way for lesbian couples to have children that are biologically their own.

Gay men could follow suit by using the technique to make eggs from male bone marrow.

Researchers at Newcastle upon Tyne University say their technique will help lead to new treatments for infertility.

But critics warn that it sidelines men and raises the prospect of babies being born through entirely artificial means.

The research centres around stem cells - the body’s ‘mother’ cells which can turn into any other type of cell.

We totally can’t wait to produce our own little genetic abnormality. Our friend, however, is not excited at the prospect of being both mother and father to some little puddle. “Manhattanhenge is a day when women want to have babies. Kinda like how full moons induce pregnancy, ” he says. “But now… They can just have their own little boners.”

And that is why he is our friend.

What do you think about this potential breakthrough? Would you ever consider implementing it?

Death of the father: British scientists discover how to turn women’s bone marrow into sperm [Daily Mail]