Eva Longoria Looks Straight Up Like A Raisin

Oh, Eva, you little trickster. You somehow, perhaps in keeping with the Met Costume Institute Balls “Superhero” theme, managed to stealthily sneak under our fashion radar. But aha! We’ve caught you! Looking both like a prune purée and the aftermath of eating a prune purée.

We know we have often made fun of you in the past for looking “rodent-like,” but it’s clearly because we are feeling insecure. You also don’t look the least bit like a tiny chihuahua attacking a wad of purple tissue paper, Eva. Purple is definitely your color. Although, perhaps, not a shade best suited for both a dress and eye makeup, as that tends to make a girl look like a giant, walking bruise. Or, in this case, like a giant, walking fungal infection. But enough with the metaphors! Um…

Yeah, so. End of post, we guess.

Met Ball Fug Carpet Fug Or Fab: Eva Longoria Parker [Go Fug Yourself]
Earlier: The Met Costume Institute Ball Was Kind Of Boring Except For Anna Wintour’s Galactic Superheroine Outfit