Ah, quinceañeras. The one time in your life where you can pretty much get away with doing any sort of stupid shit that pops into your head. It’s like a wedding, but with the probable end result of giving some dude named Hector a rusty trombone in a limo afterward. Dress your best friends like melted Skittles? ¡Si se puede! Request a cake shaped like a thugged-out Tweety Bird? ¡Si se puede! Ask for things like a George Forman grill or a velvet painting of Jesus riding a Pegasus and only be considered a moderate-level asshole? ¡Si se puede! Carry a tray of flaming drinks? …What? Why would anyone want to do that? That doesn’t even sound cool. Unless you count the resulting fireballs shooting out of this quinceañera’s dress kind of cool. Which, yeah. We definitely do.

Bride Catches Fire [Break]