Woody Allen and the cast of his latest film, Vicky Cristina Barcelona, were on hand to not discuss anything interesting about their movie in Cannes:

Allen brushed aside a question about whether it was true that Spanish directors were upset with Allen over the reported 1 million Euros in financing for the film given him by the Spanish government, saying that “I know nothing about the financing of my films,” and that he was simply offered the opportunity to make a film in Barcelona, and agreed to do so.

He said that, so far as he is aware, there is no backlash from Spanish directors aimed at him, and quipped that while the press might like to believe that, and make more of it than it is, it simply isn’t so.

Lies. The Spanish hate everyone. Even lesbians:

The only question Cruz didn’t really answer was about the “lesbian kiss scene” between herself and Scarlett Johansson. She said with a sigh that she’s been asked that question four times already today, and that she hasn’t had a good answer to it and so has declined to answer it. She said that she’d asked herself, “what would Woody Allen say?” in response to that question, and she still doesn’t know … and so once again politely declined.

We saw Matchpoint. We realize there’s no real reason to watch Woody Allen films anymore; they’re no longer going to act as cultural touchstones to be referenced over and over. They only reason we’d have for watching one his movies at this point is to watch Scarlett Johansson possibly make out with another woman, after fast-forwarding through her painful attempts at emoting.

Cannes 2008: Vicky Cristina Barcelona Press Conference [Cinematical]