Beyond The Barrio: Ninja, Please! School On Lock Down After Elusive Ninja Sighting

A Barnegut, New Jersey school was placed on lock down after reports of a ninja running through the woods nearby. Sadly, it was just a random costumed child molester:

Turns out the ninja was actually a camp counselor dressed in black karate garb and carrying a plastic sword.

Hey, New Jersey? On behalf of the entire state of Florida, we thank you.

Also, anyone who knows anything about ninjas knows some pudgy middle-aged man running behind an elementary school ain’t no ninja. Get your facts straight, after the jump:

Ninjas can kill anyone they want! Ninjas cut off heads ALL the time and don’t even think twice about it. These guys are so crazy and awesome that they flip out ALL the time. I heard that there was this ninja who was eating at a diner. And when some dude dropped a spoon the ninja killed the whole town. My friend Mark said that he saw a ninja totally uppercut some kid just because the kid opened a window.

God, so true.

School locked down after ‘ninja’ sighted in woods [NY Times]
Best Ninja Site Probably Ever [RealUltimatePower]