Introducing The Bosom-Schmuser. “Everyone Does It. And The Best: It Is Completely Free!”

It’s really fun to read German newspapers because they come up with stories about how everyone is kissing bosoms this summer and you should be, too. Also! Translating said articles with Babel Fish makes the journalist sound like Dieter:

The hottest trend in this summer! Almost everyone does it. And the best: It is completely free!

Until you get arrested for aggravated sexual assault! We’re looking at you, Andy Dick. One of the youngsters around Guanabee headquarters, asked how this differs from motorboating. Once we got over the shock of learning what that is, we decided that this may be the exact same thing. At least water seems to be a theme in both. After the jump, a gallery of famous bosom schmusers. “Who’s with whom cuddles and nibbles, you see here!”

“Anchor cuddling is talking about the teen stars Vanessa Hudgens and Zac Efron (High School Musical) in Fashion.”

“Rocker Rod Stewart gets from wife Penny Lancaster some support, so that it can cost her bosom.”

“Hot party with James Blunt on a deluxe yacht. Right in the middle: Mystery Woman who stands apparently not only on her popstar’s lover, but also on the bosoms of the blonde.”

Das sind die schönsten Busen-Schmuser [Bild]
The are the most beautiful bosom-Schmuser [Bild translated]