Coconuts For Sale

No, we’re not supplementing our income with prostitution. Baroom-ching! We received an email about some exciting coconuts! From Brazil! Check it:

Re: Coconuts of Brazil !!! Offer !!!

Triple exclamation points indicate three times the fun AND SAVINGS!!!

Dear Sirs,

We have coconuts with quality on offer! Enjoy, limited stock.

Color us intrigued:

FOB BRAZILIAN PORT: USD 0.79 / UNIT

FOB? Insulting!

CNTR 20′ Reefer: 6.000 units

CNTR 40′ Reefer: 12.000 units

Reefers?

Please, inform your port for CIF price.

Thank you and best regards,

Alex de Lira Rodrigues

We will take seventy-five bajillion, please! Right after we finish up wiring this nice Nigerian business man several thousand dollars to save his dying father. Funnily enough, when we looked up “Focus Trading Brazil,” which seems to be the name of this alluring coconut-schilling enterprise, we got a website selling caskets and grout. We know what a certain someone is getting for his birthday…