Miguel Angel Rivera Lemus accidentally fell on a knife he was using to try and get his children out of a locked car. Right as his common-law wife located an extra set of keys. Uh:

Authorities said Lemus and his common-law wife had gone to their south Charlotte apartment Sunday afternoon to pick something up before they headed out for another errand. Police said the couple, without realizing it, closed their car doors with their keys and children inside.

Frantic, police said, the couple tried to find a way to open the car. The wife searched for a spare set of keys. Lemus, meanwhile, grabbed a large butcher knife which police believe he was going to use to pry open the car’s window.

But as Lemus went out of the apartment, he fell down six stairs and landed on the knife.

Think that’s bad? Ha! Hold onto to your fuzzy puppy stories, because shit gets worse:

Police said he managed to return to the apartment unit and asked his wife to call 911. She had been able to get the children out of the car using a spare set of keys. The children were not injured, police said.

That is suspicious as hell. Falling six flight onto a knife? Wouldn’t your reaction be to throw the knife as you fall? And why grab a knife to open a door instead of, say, a hanger? Or those, uh, extra set of keys? Or trying to coach the children to pull up the locks from the inside? How were they able to get into the apartment without their keys anyway? Shady, shady.

Father stabs himself, dies trying to rescue his children [Charlotte Observer]