Jessica Alba Sells Suffrage, Self

The best way to get kids to register to vote (as Democrats)? Wrap a woman in electrical tape and give her a Charlie horse while screaming “U! S! A!” “Declare Yourself” and a tear-stained Jessica Alba have teamed up to freak you out / turn you on / make you completely forget there’s an election coming up. Their voter registration page, designed to gain you membership into the infernal spiraling vortex that is the U.S. two-party system, features this super-glamorous image of Jessica alba -about to get a load to the face- being silenced by a Muslim terrorist, or a Libertarian. Go to an isolated area and check out the image, after the jump:

There’s no way we’re going to look at a picture of a seemingly-naked woman wrapped in glossy tape reminiscent of PVC, weeping in full makeup, and think there’s anything else going on but a blatant attempt to try and sexualize… something. Voting? Silence? Jessica Alba? “Only you can silence yourself?” Maybe, when it comes to the voting process. But attempts at silencing women so that we can focus on them as blank surfaces onto which to project sexual fantasies? Yeah, anyone can do that.

Instead of presenting a sexually-charged portrait of Jessica in a BDSM fantasy-play and presenting her as a victim, why not, you know. Feature her overcoming silence? Or why not use images of words being erased? Or men and women with their mouths taped? Why make “silencing yourself” look kind of hot? Isn’t it supposed to be, like, kind of bad? Whatever. Just make sure to bring a pack of baby wipes if you happen to use the voting booth Jessica’s just been in.

Register To Vote [Declare Yourself]