Mantyhose: Ideal Gift For Men Into Hos

A week or two ago, we heard Christmas carols playing while we eating a Mexican burger (which is basically just a hamburger that gives you chronic diarrhea for three days) at a diner and we got to thinking, “Shit. Christmas presents!” Which got us really worried because our boyfriend consistently out-gifts us. But we think we finally found the perfect gift this year. There is seriously no way he’s going to top this: Mantyhose! Even better? They come in a cool pattern that evokes tribal tattoos. Haha, score!

Some of the more close-minded amongst you might think, “What the eff…” But this is an amazing idea. And here’s why: Now men can get to know what if fucking feels like to have your leg encased in a slightly itchy, filming sausage casing all day. Dudes: Go for it. Wear pantyhose. With control tops. Wear heels. Wear makeup. Wear a purse that cuts into your shoulder. Do it. We’re completely behind you. e-MANcipate, a site devoted to accelerating “the acceptance of male pantyhose as a regular clothing item” gives us more reason why men should get all up into hos… According the e-MANcipate:

We believe that the pantyhose for men trend is healthy, sexy and positive. (Oh! I can’t yet prove that it’s sexy - so I’m working on it.)

You go boy.

Sexy

Guys could really show off their legs in a manly way, and make the fashion palette more colorful. Dressing up is fun, and men should be finally part of it, too (doubts? ask a woman!!!).

Yes, that’s right. Wearing pantyhose is fun. Especially with copious amounts of leg hair.

Healthy

It helps to improve performance in sports or jobs related to heavy leg loads; is helps to survive long flights, keeps male legs warm during winters or cool during summers (!).

Yes. They’re quite refreshing in the summer and helpful in lifting heavy objects.

Positive

Finally an issue that has only positive sides! Men will be healthier, sexier; women will be happier, the hosiery industry will explore a new market, and the consumption-driven economy finally recovers :)

Also? You can wear them over your face and make people laugh. There are no downsides to wearing pantyhose, are there? Magic.

Project e-MANcipate! [e-MANcipate]