If you guessed “stapling grapefruits to your chest whilst wandering through a wind tunnel,” you’re close. This is an for Pantene “con Pro Vitaminas.” That’s right, laaaadies. It’s an ad for Latinas!

Because it’s not enough that every young maid on every novela has to have triple D’s and hair extensions, or that Spanish-language news shows have to feature beauty queens sitting in mini skirts at clear desks, or that the women selling us Bisquik or dish soap or fabric softener all have hour glass figures and shimmery lips. You know what? Basta, we get it. We’re nothing if men don’t want to look at us, and no man wants to look at us unless we have huge breasts, a teeny waist, a white smile, a nice tan and yards of shiny, thick hair.

Forget that we tend to do just fine — have friends, get jobs, have fun — with a 32 A rack, crooked teeth, zits and short hair. So there.

This ad is selling shampoo. Seriously. [Feministing]