Salma Hayek Is Booby Trapped And Liking It
11 November 2008, 3:00 PM. By Carlos Posas
Salma Hayek says she loves breastfeeding so much that she can’t seem to stop, no matter how big she looks or how sore her nipples get. Thanks for the heads up, Sal:
“I’m like an alcoholic. It is like, I don’t care if I cry, I don’t care if I am fat, I am just going to do it for one more week, one more month, and then when I see how much good it is doing her and I can’t stop.”
Jesus Christ. Who fucking asked you?
“Let me tell you it is tough. [Ed. note: Why?] You don’t know what pain I am in after two hours, how difficult it was at first.”
Our nipples suddenly feel like they’re being mauled by angry gerbils. But we wonder. Will this breast pump make us look fat? Salma says “Yes:”
“And by the way, the myth that says you lose all this weight when you breastfeed? That is so not true! It’s like, please, will everyone stop telling me I look really well.”
Doesn’t breastfeeding burn an extra few hundred calories a day? That’s what we though. Unless, Salma, you’re actually drinking the breast milk?
We’re not quite certain why celebrities complain about photographers and media attention and then feel the need to alert the public as to the fluids they secrete from their bodies.
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Once her baby is done with them, I’ll be more than happy to step in… even if that stuff is nasty as hell.
It’s not that bad, I mean us vatos like viejas eating our leche, at least in my case. Why not drink the nectar of life ourselves (the women’s nectar that is, not dude’s!)
I’ll lovingly suckle on any part of Salma!