Spanish Club Gives Out Free Tits To Boobs

“Pachá,” a nightclub in Valencia, Spain, is offering winning club-goers a complimentary breast augmentation valued at 4,500 euros, or about 67 billion American dollars. The club’s owner, Carlos Monsell, assures that the operation will be performed by a “prestigious” cosmetic surgeon, and not some drunken Uruguayan tourist with a Bic pen, some duct tape and a dream. He’s also allowing whoever wins this contest to select some other type of surgery, like a lobotomy, should he or she so choose. And, as a bonus, there’s also the option of having botox or laser hair removal. No more frown lines or unsightly patches of hair sprouting forth from your third nipple as you hit the clubs!

The contest has some haters asking whether or not its ethical to give away cosmetic surgery procedures as prizes. Mr. Monsell, for one, thinks it is totally awesome:

“We hadn’t anticipated to face such a hassle for doing this. Society is a little hypocritical. This is the reality in which we live and Valencia is part of that.”

To which we say: Nah. We don’t see this as being particularly unethical. Just extraordinarily stupid. Personally, we’d be unwilling to have any sort of surgical procedure performed on us unless we were able to meet, interview and assess potential doctors and clinics beforehand. We’re nervous enough as it as at merely the prospect of being accidentally touched by someone in a bar and then surreptitiously performing fellatio on that someone in the bar bathroom. So we couldn’t imagine winning a new pair of chesticles from a bar.

Una discoteca sorteará una operación de aumento de pecho