Want A Nanny From Craigslist? We Don’t Either!
18 December 2008, 6:25 PM. By Guanabee Staff
This recession isn’t just hurting extremely poor people and extremely rich people, it’s also hurting that rich section of the upper-middle class that splurges on things like nannies and “girlfriend experience” prostitutes. Said section has recently started taking to Craigslist — which you know they’re obviously familiar with — to advertise their so-close-they’re-almost-family nannies. (This also includes the so-close-they’d-file-a-lawsuit-if-they-were-legal nannies) One such nanny being offered unashamedly through Craigslist is Yvette. According to her former masters, Yvette is a “gem in a sea of rocks.” Is “sea of rocks” like a mountain range or something? Because if you can find one gem in a sea of rocks, it usually means there’s an entire quarry somewhere nearby.
Says this guy of his nanny:
“She is kind and fair, and have been extremely accomdating with our schedules (I am an architect, and my wife is a med-student). Despite how much we love her, economic times have forced us to let her go, to be replaced by my mom who is coming to live with us and take care of our girl.”
We first initially read that “kind of fair” and guffawed. But then we realized we were wrong. Also, that spelling error (”accomdating”) is his, not ours. Don’t worry; spelling isn’t vital in architecture.
Another nanny out of a job soon is Yolanda from Colombia. Although her mistress contends that she is a part of the family (you now, that part that you can hack off and still live without) she seems to lack communication skills that might otherwise develop between two human beings that feel like family and/or equal. Says the mistress:
“On Friday, I tell her I have had a disastrous thing happen to me, but I don’t have the guts to tell her I cannot keep her with me any longer. I’ll wait till Wednesday.”
We’re just trying to imagine what Yolanda was thinking. If someone were like “I had a disastrous thing happen to me” we don’t know that we would assume “Oh she lost all of her money in the bad economy and now we need a new job.” We might think anything from, “Oh she got the runs” to “OMG is her boyfriend/husband really her long lost brother?” Poor Yolanda. Isn’t Wednesday Christmas Eve?
Who Will Bail Out the Yolandas and Yvettes of the World? [Gawker]
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come on u guanabee fag hags dont even know what a gfe is….
Punctuation would help make your comment more understandable. If you’re questioning our pairing of the words “girlfriend experience” with “prostitutes” than rest assured, we’ve seen enough Craig$li$t po$t$ offering apartments and college tuition in exchange for museum trips and cuddling that we feel pretty confident equating any woman who would agree to give a guy the “girlfriend experience” in exchange for tangible profits a “prostitute”.
Also, while we’ve certainly never replied to a “girlfriend experience” post, we find it difficult to believe that any man is so desperately lonely that he’d pay a girl just to sit with him without expectation of any bodily touching. It’s possible, but we don’t believe it.