Student Natalie Dylan’s Asking Price For Virginity Now Up To 7 Million
14 January 2009, 3:44 PM. By Alex Alvarez
Natalie Dylan, the student and self-professed feminist who is auctioning off her virginity in order to help pay for grad school, has now received bids of up to $7 million dollars.
You might recall that Natalie first tried to sell her nonny on auction site eBay, but was shut down because they deal with things like commemorative Jim Belushi bobbleheads, not chochas. Shock jock Howard Stern then helped a sister out by setting up an ad through the famous Bunny Ranch, a legal brothel in Las Vegas.
To date, Natalie, who is 22, has received bids from around 10,000 men who believe everything they read on the internet. She apparently got the idea from her sister, who paid for classes by being a prostitute for a mere three weeks. Is working afternoons at Dairy Queen during college really such a terrifying prospect?
Because we worry for Natalie and want her to get the most out of her degree in Family and Marriage Therapy, we’d like to offer
Some Tips on How to Spend Her $7 Million:
- Get an agent and a book deal.
People love to read about and by women who do things with their vaginas in order to do something else. See: Diablo Cody, Noelia, Ashley Alexandra Dupré, Jeremy Piven.
- Stock up on meds, and mace.
Condoms can tear, after all. And there is the possibility that a man who is willing to pay for sex with a highly publicized stranger might try to test other boundaries of what is considered “proper” sexual conduct… like lying about STDs, or pushing things farther than their partner is willing.
- Try working.
Sure, it’s not always late-night orgies on the copy machine or Guanabee Naked Mondays, and you might find yourself having to work in an ungratifying internship or entry level job for a while, but it feels pretty great to earn something you worked towards, instead of being handed things without putting forth any effort or skill. It’s worth a try, at any rate.
After all, when you happen to be late with rent, or short of spending cash, or need some extra lana to pay for your wart medication, are you going to opt for prostitution? Yes? Oh.
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ARGH! Why didn’t I think of this? This is why mom always said “Don’t just give it away.”
Once she gets this money will she even have to go to college and work?
No va jay jay is worth 7 million dollars.
These men, what they’re doing, is putting the pussy up on a pedestal.
She hasn’t sold it yet??? M’jita, we’re in a recession, take what you can get and get it fast, in cash.
You can’t deny the girl has pussy control.
Hahaha! you couldn’t resist the Prince reference huh?
So if I win this virginity, does that mean it now belongs to me? If I had the money I’d pay $20 mil to own her virginity and make her never lose it, or else she’d have to pay me double. Haha, stupid feminist. The only control she has is a fantasy.
All I can say is…. what a sad way to try to be “successful” in life.
Give your virginity away to a complete stranger for a “one-time” deal, walk away with money, and not even begin to comprehend the consequences - the backlash - the serious threats, etc. etc. that this is going to have on you for the rest of your life. Is it really worth it? The famous quote: Hindsight is 20/20. Too bad you’re too young and immature to see it!