“Joydick” Lets Men Combine Masturbating And Gaming

Some nerds with way too much time on their hands decided that it was simply too difficult to decide between jerking it and playing videogames- so they invented the “Joydick,” which combines the two and is just as terrifying as it sounds. Tutorial video after the jump (Semi-NSFW):

Defining quote: “Gameplay continues until sexual orgasm is achieved.” That’s what she said. And then she ran away, because her boyfriend had an LED enhanced ring on his penis. Most cringe-inducing part of the description? “Play Atari with yourself and friends in the manner that you always dreamed of.” We have nothing against a good circlejerk but since when is this a mainstream fantasy? Guys…care to confess?

Bonus nerd points: trying to justify this device through philosophical rambling.

“It would be reasonable to assert that the tension that builds during gameplay and the release achieved through victory are similar to the events leading up and through a sexual orgasm. In fact, the similarities between the mechanics and objectives of both sex and video games are so striking that it may be fair to say that gameplay, particular video games, are driven by displaced sexual energy.”

Well maybe if you weren’t spending all day soldering sensors onto penis rings then your sexual energy wouldn’t be “displaced,” to begin with.

The Joydick [SF Media]