New Referendum Allows Hugo Chavez To Be President Forever And Ever And Ever

Venezuelan President Hugo Chavez is up for indefinite re-election after Venezuelans voted to abolish term limits. Electoral authorities say 54% of voters backed the constitutional amendment.

Chavez addressed Venezuelans on the balcony of his presidential palace, saying: “It is a clear victory for the people. It is a clear victory for the revolution.” Then he punched a baby while laughing.

Chavez’s long-time friend and mentor, Fidel Castro, wished him congratulations from his deathbed giant, inflatable bounce house. The Obama administration, meanwhile, is said to be “dismayed” at the news, despite Chavez’s attempts at forming a friendship with our new president. 

Chavez has already been in power for a decade now, and has mentioned running beyond 2030. “Chavistas” celebrated in the streets, elated at the news. They credit Chavez with passing poverty-alleviating programs like free health care. The referendum passed with 54% of votes, so there is still a sizable portion of the population who are less than heartened at the news. Chavez’s presidency has been plagued by growing inflation, high crime and crumbling infrastructure. The same referendum had had been narrowly rejection back in December of 2007.

Flyers advocating voting “Si” to the referendum listed several good, solid reasons to vote yes. For example: ”Chavez loves us and love is repaid with love” and “Chavez is incapable of doing us harm.”

Hugo Chávez wins referendum allowing indefinite re-election [The Guardian]