Milking Elvis Crespo’s snake on a plane for all it’s worth, Univision asked the stars at Premio Lo Nuestro how they felt about Elvis getting caught masturbating. Sound bites range from the demure, “No comment,” to the brazen “Everybody does it. More power to you, bro.” Well, we won’t be sitting next to any Norteño bands on [...]
31 March 2009
But What Does The Entertainment World Think Of Elvis Crespo Masturbating?
By Cindy Casares at 7:00 PM.
eHarmony Forced To Go Gay By New Jersey Attorney General
By Cindy Casares at 6:15 PM.
eHarmony, the Orville Redenbacher dating site that has been exclusively for heteros since it launched in 2000, has been forced by a lawsuit from New Jersey’s attorney general to open a separate but equal website that caters to gays. Who’s going to be the first one to post a picture of their platano?
Caliah Clark Dropped From Second Floor Into Strangers’ Arms
By Cindy Casares at 5:30 PM.
Robert Lemire and Alex Day are Guanabee’s Hispanics of the Month for saving 18 month-old Caliah Clark after she dropped forty feet out a window from her home. Bob and Alex are probably not Hispanic, but how can you argue semantics when you hear a story like this: Bob was on the phone outside [...]
Ricky Martin Makes His Babies Rich, Does Not Want Them To Be Singers
By Alex Alvarez at 5:00 PM.
Ricky Martin, smart DILF that he is, has set up a trust fund for each of his baby twin sons. Matteo and Valentino will each receive seven million dollars - if they complete a college education. Does this mean Ricky doesn’t want them to be sexy yoga instructors?
Cesar Chavez Honored By Barack Obama
By Alex Alvarez at 4:15 PM.
Today would have been Cesar Chavez’s 82nd birthday, and President Barack Obama - who borrowed Chavez’s “Si Se Puede” slogan for his campaign until it became the soundtrack to our nightmare in which white liberal art college grads assault us with clipboards - is taking time to remember Chavez and his legacy.
Perez Hilton Is Looking Good, Feeling Gorgeous At His 31st Birthday Party
By Alex Alvarez at 3:30 PM.
Perez Hilton celebrated his 31st birthday in style! Precisely what style that happens to be, we do not rightly know. At any rate, Perez looked like he had a good time, despite a lack of sponsors… or memorable guests… or general interest. But at least his hair looked interesting!
Pistachio Recall Latest Proof The Government Is Trying To Kill You
By Cindy Casares at 2:45 PM.
Salmonella–are we right or are we right? Salmonella tainted food warnings have become the terrorist alerts of the late oughts and this month’s scary food that might kill you is the dreaded pistachio.
Damn You, Coca-Cola, For Making Us Cry
By Cindy Casares at 2:00 PM.
Coca-Cola is going straight for the jugular with this new spot they ran on Univision during Premio Lo Nuestro. It features, in 60 seconds, old people, babies and allusions to the end of the world. You don’t stand a chance.
Watchando: Is Sorry, Ms. Jackson. For Speeding And Whatnot.
By Alex Alvarez at 1:15 PM.
Andre 3000 was arrested in Atlanta for driving at 109 mph. Go Andre, go!
[AllHipHop]
Is Naomi Campbell heading to Bollywood? Please?!
[Yahoo]
Sacha Baron Cohen’s Bruno movie got an NC-17 rating because of buttsecks.
[The Wrap]
George Lopez Late Night Pilot Features Shakira’s Tim Mitchell And Audience Sidekicks
By Cindy Casares at 12:30 PM.
Turns out George Lopez recorded a pilot last year for his TBS late night talk show premiering this fall. Word on the net was they couldn’t sell it, but obvs. that’s all changed. The pilot featured Shakira’s band led by her guitarist/musical director Tim Mitchell who has made a career working with such stars as Gloria [...]
Meet Camille Guaty
By Alex Alvarez at 12:00 PM.
Camilla Guaty is currently making the rounds over the internet thanks to her role in the ABC romantic comedy “Cupid.” Since its not everyday a relatively unknown Latina actress is in the press for something other than trying to punch a photographer while seated in a wheelchair, we thought we’d try to find out a [...]
Sandra Cantu, 8, Missing From California Home
By Alex Alvarez at 11:15 AM.
Eight-year-old Sandra Cantu has been missing from her Tracy, California mobile home park since last Friday. Her mother, Maria Chavez, believes she was kidnapped and went on the Today show to ask for help in bringing her back.
YES! Video Of Michelle Rodriguez Chasing Down A Photographer
By Alex Alvarez at 11:08 AM.
Aw yeah. Here’s the actual video footage of Michelle Rodriguez leaping up from her wheelchair, tired and sick after a long flight to Mexico City from Frankfurt, to chase down a paparazzo. She also manages to yell a few choice words at him - in Spanish! Is there anything Michelle can’t do?
Why The Fuck Do You Have A Kid? (And Can We Borrow It?)
By Alex Alvarez at 10:30 AM.
“Why The Fuck Do You Have A Kid?” is a site that ventures to take a look into the strange, sparkly .gif-filled world of teen pregnancies.
The site avoids pointing fingers and laughing at any particular economic class, social group, race or gender and does a great job of pointing out how absurd it is to [...]
Creeptastic: “Today” Announces That Lourdes Leon-Ciccone Is All Grown Up… At 12
By Alex Alvarez at 9:45 AM.
Lourdes, Madonna’s young daughter, has become known for being something of a fashionista in her own right, far away from the crotch-enhancing bodysuits and red string bracelets with which her mother is so taken. Now, she’s apparently known for something else: Being totally hot! Or something.
This Looks Good: Sugar Starring Algenis Perez Soto
By Cindy Casares at 9:00 AM.
If you’ve ever wondered what Dominicans who barely speak English feel like when they come to America to play in the majors, you might enjoy Sugar, from Anna Boden and Ryan Fleck, the writer/director team who brought you Half Nelson.
30 March 2009
Chileans Stunned As 1,500 Dead Penguins Wash Ashore
By Camilla Rowan at 6:00 PM.
Residents of Caleta Queule, Chile, found hundreds of dead penguins washed up on their beach last Thursday. Since then, dead penguins have continued to float ashore en masse, with Sunday’s total estimate at around 1,500 over the past four days, but scientists and locals still have no idea why this is happening.
Bill O’Reilly Is Not Paying Money To Watch Sean Penn Act As A Stooge
By Alex Alvarez at 5:30 PM.
We have something in common with Bill O’Reilly. Actually, a few things. Other than our shared love of “falafels,” we, like, Bill, find Sean Penn incredibly irritating. Bill takes it one step further by refusing to pay to watch any film starring Sean Penn. Gasp! Does this mean he’s going to skip the cinematic masterpiece [...]
