And Now Jesus Luz Says He Never Cheated On Madonna

While Madonna is buying children, Jesus Luz is insisting that he never cheated on Madonna and that he really loves and miss her money terribly. Buy him instead! Jesus admitted to dancing with Luciana Costa at a party, but says the two are just friends and that he just can’t help it if ladies want to get all. Up. On him.

Muttered Jesus, insolently: “I danced with her, but I danced with everyone at the party. My mum was at my side (at the party) and never would I become intimate with a woman if my mum was nearby - even if I was interested in that person.”

Interesting little post script he tacked up there at the end. He might as well have said “- even if they did have their original face and didn’t smell of dead woodchucks and formaldehyde.” 

Witnesses, however, say they say Jesus whisper in Luciana’s ear all night and that his mother was actually nowhere near the party. Which is odd, because who doesn’t bring their mom to dance parties with them?

Jesus also confessed he was talking a vacation in order to have fun - alone: “I am going on a trip, not to the US, alone and to have fun. The trip is for personal and not professional reasons. I am going to entertain myself.” We hope he at least waits until he disembarks, though. 

As to the matter of one of his exes having referred to Madonna as a “ridiculous old bag,” Jesus said “she’s more of a ridiculous old shoe.” No. He said:

I ignore this type of thing because it is very futile and I have nothing to say about it.

Do you recall when I said that people are trying to promote themselves (on my fame)? The person who refers to her (Madonna) refers to a great professional.

Madonna has reached a certain level of conduct or position in life and it would be difficult for her to suffer from comments from other people. Imagine if I would allow myself to be affected by what people are saying about me - I would be a very unhappy person.

He also mentioned that he enjoyed studying Kaballah and does not see a reason to discontinue pursuing it. Barring, of course, finding out the Buddhism is “like really cool.”

Sigh. If these two crazy kids can’t work things out, who can?

Madge’s Jesus: I’m no cheat [The Sun]