Octomom Nadya Suleman Shops Around $1 Million Birthing Video While She Shops For Expensive Clothes

Nadya “Octomom” Suleman, when not practicing poses in her cracked bedroom mirror, is out spending the money she’s set to make on a video of her pushing eight robo-babies out from the terrible abyss betwixt her mass of writhing tentacles. She buys fancy clothes! And houses! And college educations for her children! coffee!

So, how does Nadya make enough money to spend on fancypeople clothing instead of her usual pee-soaked rags? One way is through shopping around a video of her giving birth to her octuplets - eight, tiny, misshapen wrinkled pinky-gray masses shrieking and clawing their way out of a throbbing pit of teeth and bone and hair and Botox that emits a high-pitched scream. She’s said to be trying to sell the tape for $1 million. We totally can’t wait to see it. Especially after this description of it by Nadya: “It made me emontional… to actually see the little flailing bodies come out.”

TMZ’s Harvey Levin claims to have already seen the video and says it’s clear that  the camera person, a friend of Nadya’s, was annoying and getting in the way of medical staff trying to assist with the birth.

For her appearance on “The Dr. Phil Show,” Nadya purchased a $228 blouse made of toilet paper and bruises, as well as a pair of $195 Tory Burch flats. So now she looks like a beautiful, fancy lady and not a terrible troll-beast who is poor and gross and neglectful. Here she is talking to Dr. Phil about how healthy her miniscule womb goblins are:

The mother of 14, when not threatening to terrify the nation with her birthing footage, is also getting free, round-the-clock childcare from Angels in Waiting - the very same organization whose offer for help she had initially refused because they did not agree to become part of a reality series. 

And the purchase of her new home was, apparently, paid for and brokered by her father, Ed Doud. It must be so awesome to live life without any responsibilities or consequences, just flailing babies and sparkles and collagen cupcakes. Sigh.

OctoMom: Shopping More Than Just a Birth Tape [TMZ]

Octo-Mom Help is Here! [Us Weekly, print]