Is Perez Hilton Still Writing His Own Posts, Or Is Someone Else Drawing Cum Spurts For Him?

We’ve suspected for a while now that Perez Hilton, né Mario Lavandeira, has had some help writing his blog posts. Our suspicions were heightened yesterday, when an entry posted on his blog included not only a pop culture gaffe, but also referred to a celebrity spawn as “a cutie.” This isn’t the Perez we know and moderately tolerate! What gives?

The story in question featured Madonna’s youngest son, David, traipsing about in an Iron Man costume in the middle of the day like someone’s drunk uncle. The post erroneously stated that little David was dressed like Spider Man. Which is fine. We’ve accidentally referred to Marc Anthony as a malignant tumor many times; mistakes happen. What got to us most was the fact that the post referred to David as a “cutie” and “an adorable tot.”

This from a man who has previously been called out for making fun of celebrity offspring and the likes of Dakota Fanning? It just doesn’t seem like him. In fact, an LA Times article on celebrity kids that ran just one year ago showed a very different Perez:

“I don’t feel bad at all,” he says of posts on PerezHilton.com that poke fun at the prominent chin of Rumer Willis (daughter of Demi Moore and Bruce Willis). Or his physical criticism of Christie Brinkley and Bill Joel’s daughter Alexa Ray Joel (”no supermodel”). In fact, his ribbing of her prompted the 22-year-old singer to strike back on her MySpace page by calling him “dangerous.”

[...]At the moment, perezhilton.com finds Suri Cruise “adorable.” But when she grows into an awkward adolescent? ”I’ll say, ‘What happened to Suri,’ ” Hilton says, “if she’s ugly.”

Back when “Perez Hilton” was still called “PageSixSixSix,” the blog’s voice was downright vicious, written from the point of view of a Hollywood outsider who pulled no punches in calling celebrities out on their trifling bullshit. As Perez Hilton’s visibility grew larger, so did his head. Punny speculations about the state of Paris Hilton’s underwear were replaced with photo after photo of Perez posing with his “cousin,” and nary a negative story was written about her since. Gone are the humor and irreverent attitude that one characterized the “Queen of all Media’s” site and made it “Hollywood’s Most Hated,” and in their place are product placements, one to three sentence posts about SaMANtha Ronson and Lindsay Lohan queefing in LA, and videos promoting indie artists with cute haircuts. 

We’re sure Perez’s rise in celebrity has not only garnered him connections he’s wary of burning on his site, but also takes up a lot of his time - perhaps prompting a little help from an intern or assistant. After all, hoodies featuring neon unicorns shooting exploding heart revolvers at Kanye West’s sunglasses don’t design themselves.