Narco Wars: Top 5 Hottest Deadly Horrible Narco Nicknames

Juan Manuel Jurado Zarzoza, known fondly among his screaming victims as the “Puma,” was arrested in Cancun last week along with three other suspected drug traffickers. The Puma (not to be confused with El Puma) is believed to be the leader of a cartel and involved with the murder of a general that took place last February.

Why is it that so many people involved in the drug trade or in a mob of some sort have to have nicknames? Is it some sort of male bonding thing of which we’ve never been privy? In any case, here are 5 of our favorite Narco Nicknames, in no particular order:

5. El Canicon

Translation: The Big Marble

Real name:  Sigifredo Najera Talamantes

This name says “smooth,” “cold” and “comically-shaped head.” Ideal, really, for cold-blooded murderer. 

4. El Pozolero 

Translation: The Pozole Maker

Real name: Santiago Meza Lopez

So named because he was hired to get rid of victims’ corpses by stirring their remains into vats of lie until the resembled pozole, El Pozolero is probs not something whose dinner invitation we would be inclined to accept.

3. El Gori

Translation: No friggin’ clue.

Real name: Raymundo Almanza Morales

We have no idea what his name means - is it, perhaps, a play on the word “gory?” A shortened form of “gordi?” We’ve no idea. And this is what makes El Gori so irresistible to women and law enforcement officials alike - his mystery.

2. El Rey Del Cielo

Translation: The King of the Skies

Real name: Amado Carrillo Fuentes

It’s the humility of the name that endears itself to us, really.

1. El Puma

Translation: The Panther

Real name: Jose Luis Rodriguez

Ay! Rawr and such.

Mexico drug gang ‘boss’ arrested [BBC]