30 September 2009

Modern Family Recap: Modern Family Sucks. So There.

By Alex Alvarez at 10:21 PM.

13 Comments

Oh Jesus fucking Christ. We mean. Ugh, come on. Maybe we’ve had more than a few screwdrivers at this point, but. UGH! THIS SHOW IS TERRIBLE.

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Sesame Street Does Mad Men

By Alejandro Paz at 5:48 PM.

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PennyTalk Helps You To Be A Cringe-Inducing Stereotype All Over The World, For Cheap!

By Alex Alvarez at 5:13 PM.

5 Comments

Do you have a corny and outdated stereotype about white people? Mexicans? Indians? Oh, good. You’ll feel right at home here.

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911 Call: Lexus Accelerates Out Of Control Due To Floor Mats, Prompting Recall

By Alex Alvarez at 4:35 PM.

3 Comments

Rick Sanchez aired a 911 call depicting the moment before a Lexus holding four terrified passengers accelerated uncontrollably at an intersection, resulting in the deaths of everyone inside.

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The Only Anne Frank Video Footage In Existence

By Nacomprende at 4:12 PM.

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Ruhama Canellis: “My Love Is Real & Alberto Cutié And I Were Totally Going To Tell You All About It, You Guys”

By Alex Alvarez at 4:01 PM.

One Comment

Ruhama Canellis, the woman who won former Catholic priest Alberto Cutié’s heart and groin, is speaking out about their relationship. Again.

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Micheletti: “Our Only Error Was Kicking Him Out The Way We Did”

By Nacomprende at 3:40 PM.

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Jennifer Lopez’s Miami Home Is Made Of Dreams, Unicorns

By Alex Alvarez at 3:07 PM.

2 Comments

Hello, Guanaburgers.

It is I, Jennifer Lopez de Anthony. I have come onto this web-thing to give you a tour of my fabulous Miami apartment.

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Pitbull On The Cover Of Source

By Alex Alvarez at 2:19 PM.

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Amy Winehouse Raps. Kind Of.

By Alex Alvarez at 2:15 PM.

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The Curse Of Macbeth Trailer: Femdom Meets Shakespeare

By Alejandro Paz at 2:11 PM.

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Wynonna Judd Children’s Teacher Arrested For Child Porn

By Alex Alvarez at 1:59 PM.

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France Looking More Objectively At Polanski Case

By Nacomprende at 1:50 PM.

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White Problems™: Please Don’t Take A Picture Of My Dog

By Alex Alvarez at 1:39 PM.

5 Comments

In our latest look into the phenomenon that is people with White Problems™, we will seek to figure out why, exactly, some people are so protective of their pooches, going so far as to make sure strangers don’t take an unauthorized photo of their little darling on the street.

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Outrage Over Nude Picture Of A 10-year-old Brooke Shields

By Nacomprende at 1:06 PM.

One Comment

Meghan McCain Defends Zapatero’s Goth Daughters

By Alex Alvarez at 12:22 PM.

19 Comments

Meghan McCain, dark mistress of the night, has defended Spanish Prime Minister José Luis Rodríguez Zapatero’s two goth daughters, Laura and Alba, after the two were criticized by the press and public for their style of dress.

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Auto-Tune A Baby

By Alex Alvarez at 11:53 AM.

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Billionaire Clown Heads For Outer Space

By Nacomprende at 11:37 AM.

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Mariah Carey Wants To Be A Mom To Someone Other Than Nick Cannon

By Alex Alvarez at 11:36 AM.

5 Comments

In an interview appearing in the latest issue of InTouch, Mariah Carey says she’s really looking forward to being a mother and waxes poetic about her perfect life and marriage to Nick Cannon and blahbbity blah in eight octaves.

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Ladies: Meet Your Dream Date, Circa 1985

By Alejandro Paz at 11:10 AM.

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