Eva Longoria Stretches Her Texas A & I/Cal State Education To Explain The Importance Of The Census For Latinos

Now that Eva Longoria Parker is a learned, graduate scholar of Chicano Studies, she’s ready to advise the Latino community on important political matters like that dastardly 2010 U.S. Census boycott. You know, the one that some dumbasses are recommending for illegal aliens. These are the same people, by the way, who think God cares if you’re a homo. Like Reverend Miguel Rivera of the National Coalition of Idiot Latino Clergy.

Eva sat down with CNN’s Soledad O’Brien to discuss, amongst other things, why participating in the census is so important. She almost got through it without sounding like a kinesiology major from Texas A & I, too, but unfortunately, you can actually hear the hamsters in her brain racing back and forth to access words like, “data,” and “state and federal funding” in her underused civics vocabulary. She still sounds smarter than Reverend Miguel, though. Take it away, Eva.

Hear that Latinos? Be counted! A la bim! A la bum! A la bim! Bum! Ba! Colegio! Colegio! Ra! Ra! Ra!