No, Really: Shakira Is Seeing A Freudian Therapist About Her Oral Fixation

Shakira, she of truthful hips, is in therapy with a Freudian analyst, according to a recent interview for the upcoming issue of Rolling Stone magazine. Among the topics the Colombian singer is apparently broaching with her therapist is her oral fixation. And she’d like you all to know about it! Again.

You might recall that Shakira’s 2005 album - Oral Fixation Vol. 2 - drew a bit of attention from the fact that, you know. PENIS. At the time of the album’s release, Shakira said the following:

The title comes from the fact that I have always lived through my mouth. It is my biggest source of pleasure and my most accessible vehicle to discover and enjoy the world. I am fixated on chocolate! I am fixated on the spoken word, the written word, the things I have said and the things I should never have said. This is the reason why I decided on the names for the albums.

Shakira reiterate this idea for Rolling Stone:

I’ve always lived through my mouth. It’s my biggest source of pleasure: what I say, what I sing, the kisses I give, the chocolate I eat.

It also happened to make for a slightly more subtle album title than Anal Retention VII: Unplugged.

Perhaps we are but one among the uncultured, ignorant, filthy, terribly vulgar masses, but we are beginning to grow slightly tired of Shakira dismissing the overtly sexual overtones that have come to characterize her most recent incarnation as an entertainer. When we think of “oral fixation” as it applies to pop culture, a love of words and chocolate are not quite what first springs to mind with the exuberant energy of a seventh grade boy called up to the front of class while he’s in the middle of doodling his teacher naked. 

She’s a sexual person and/or the character she wishes to portray to the public is sexy. She wears tight clothes and gyrates seductively and warbles about sex and skin and teta mountains and the like. And none of this takes away from Shakira’s intelligence or her commitment to charity. Being sexy and wanting to discuss sex doesn’t diminish Shakira. Unless she allows it to. And this is precisely why we wish she would stop acting as if she wasn’t making willful, calculated attempts to produce a sexual persona for the sake of either marketing or expressing herself as an artist. Own the fixation, Shakira. Let the she wolf out the damn closet already. Don’t seek to insult yourself or your audience by pretending that a fondness for poetry and bonbons pushes albums.

Oh, and also? She wants to make a womb troll. Possibly by thinking very hard and eating chocolates:

My body feels like it is asking to reproduce, to have a huge belly and carry babies.

That’s funny. Our body feels like cramming itself full of chocolate.

Shakira planning for baby and talks about her oral fixation [NY Daily News]