Chiquis & Raq-C: Somebody Loses Their Balls

And so we're back with more Chiquis & Raq-C. We bet you've had some sleepless nights ever since we stopped covering the show, right? Well for better or worse, it's back. Why? We actually spent our last weekend in L.A. and while walking around in a lovely neighborhood known as "ghetto-ass downtown" (a beautiful, quaint area of Los Angeles), we ran into the collectible item you see to your right. Shocked at the sight of such flagrant tactlessness, we collapsed on-spot.

After being picked off the floor by some angry homeless guy who smelled like Twinkies, we recovered consciousness and said "mmm, I wonder if that one show is still on?" Being respectful of cholas, we took a Sharpie marker and wrote on our arm "check to see if 'chencha & chubsie' is still on-air." Today we finally got around to it and, to our amazement, it still is.

Sadly, there's not much going on with the damn show. On the 9th episode, Jenni, who's the only semi-interesting person in the show, barely gives any facetime. Instead we learn about Raq-C and her dog Turbo, a 4-year-old pitbull that acts like any normal dog, yet, is portrayed as "rowdy." Yeah, Chiqui's & Raq-C is now this mundane:

Since Turbo is acting "crazy" and dude above just told her it would be a good idea to cut the dog's balls, Raq-C turns to a real veterinarian for advice. After she decides to neuter Turbo, she also considers hanging his testicles over her rear-view mirror just like you would with a pair of fluffy dice. Oh letting him "hit it real quick for one last time." Nice, Raq-C:

Nothing exceptional happens to Chiquis in this episode. Actually, she's barely in it. There's also a boring thing about Raq-C 're-connecting' with her father but we think your time is important so we skipped it. The next episode, however, is looking much more damaging to your brain cells. Just listen to Juan Rivera, the dude that dresses up as a narco when he performs, talk to Chiquis about getting breast implants. We'd pretty much rather have all of our uncles fondle us in inappropriate ways -- all the same time -- instead of having to listen to this guy talk about anything:

*We nod our head in deep shame*