Christina Aguilera has a new video for her single “Keeps Gettin’ Better.” Which is ironic. Horward Stern’s rest stop in New Jersey is being shut down. He’ll always have that glory hole in Florida. [StarPulse] Donny and Marie Osmond...

Christina Aguilera is looking sort of like she’s starring in a community theater adaptation of Hedwig and the Angry Inch in these photos. And we love it. We never really understand Christina’s intermittent attempts at being “classy.” Girl, just...

Aw, poor Prince William! He had always been known as the “hot prince” - a title he’s since lost to his younger, ginger brother, Harry. Now Wills is forced to hang around with the likes of Christina Aguilera and...

First Jessica Alba, and now Christina Aguilera have loaned their foxy good looks to the Declare Yourself campaign because they just luuuurve America SO MUCH. They also love violent bondage, according to these PSAs. Shot by famed trendy photog...

There wasn’t really much that was that was interesting about last night’s MTV VMAs, save for comedian and event host Russell Brand’s hair. It is full of mysteries and missing items, like Britney Spears’ relevance and MTV’s music videos....

Christina Aguilera’s new fragrance, Inspire, has a fantastic new commercial. In it, Christina chases a giant pimple! Then pops it! And magic comes out. It’s sexy and feminine and inspirational. Just like Christina! The fragrance, made from self-tanner, baby...

Here’s Suri Cruise talking to a baby doll and OMG CAN WE HAVE HER???? [dlisted] Christina Aguilera’s new perfume ad was Photoshopped by blind unicorns on acid. [ONTD] Donnie Wahlberg is divorcing his wife of 9 years. This is...

Australian singer Sia is in talks to work with Christina Aguilera on the latter’s upcoming album. We’re a huge fan of Sia’s music and an even bigger fan of Christina’s general batshit craziness, so we think this can only...

Christina Aguilera would like you to vote right after you listen to her turn one note into seventy-five while holding some sort of smallish troll-thing. Antonio Banderas might be returning to Broadway in “Don Giovanni.” Just stay away from...

In a new interview with Glamour magazine to talk about — what else? — her baby and her body, Christina Aguilera reveals some extra hilarious nuggets of wisdom. She goes on at length at how she was never photographed...

Singer with boobs, Christina Aguilera, is going to share an “intimate moment with her son” for all of America to witness. Which is kind of the opposite of the definition of the word “intimate,” but oh well. Who are...

Silicone and cookies! Yum. Christina Aguilera has announced that she plans to breastfeed her son Max until he turns two. Because you were wondering: “Christina knows lots of women breastfeed until their kids are two years old-she even heard...

“How long”, asks Boston Globe correspondent Beth Teitell, “does a new mother get to lose the baby weight before people start, you know, talking?” We don’t know, but god forbid your body doesn’t shrink back into a more socially-acceptable...

Poor Christina. Not only is she at the mercy of music critics, tabloid editors and sexy, sexy bloggers over her choices in everything from song lyrics to lipstick color, now she’s being blasted for her perceived lack of mothering...

We know pop stars have a lot of gifts to contribute to the world, like their talent and gentle morning news show advice on how to improve our grotesque, plebeian, mutant selves. So it’s totally forgivable that they have...

Sexually sexual sexpot Christina Aguilera would like to have another baby, because it being a mom makes her feel sexy: When asked if she wants more babies, Christina replied: “Oh, eventually, yes! Yess, absolutely. Absolutely! “Motherhood comes very naturally...

Christina Aguilera is pimping out her infant son, Max, for a “Rock the Vote” campaign. She’s going after the Latina-with-babies-who-don’t-move-magazines demographic, we guess: In the new broadcast ad, set to debut later this summer, Aguilera sings a lullaby of...

Nervous after having been raised in an abusive household, Christina Aguilera made sure to screen Jordan Bratman before agreeing to marry his ass. The screening did not require her to dress him in leather chaps and feed him bits...

Christina Aguilera isn’t exactly a shy one, is she? She’s ready and willing to talk about being pregnant, losing the baby weight and the amazing chesticles she’s received in the process: “It’s kind of hilarious! I’ve never fit into...

Well. That sure is a lovely sweat-dress she isn’t quite wearing....

Christina Aguilera’s Los Angeles neighbors are reportedly up to here (roughly the left areola) with the singer and her husband’s propensity for enjoying late night romps in their pool: “They don’t just splash around - they laugh, scream, swear...

Have you ever wondered what it would be like to sleep with a celebrity? Other than Dakota Fanning, people. Well, Pipedream Products, makers of various novelty sex toys, has come out with a line of “love dolls” modeled after...

Orangey singer Christina Aguilera is chalking up her rapid weight loss since giving birth to breastfeeding. Man. We get it. You’ve got boobs. They’re as big as our head. Jesus Christ: She told TV show Access Hollywood: “I think...

Jessica Alba likes to eat ham and cheese sandwiches, but only if they’re in the form of a croque monsieur in a Parisian café. She’s tres fancy and shit. [MySpace] Shhh! Don’t tell Adriana Lima that bras go under...

Desperate actress Eva Longoria lends her shrill, obnoxious voice to Hilary Clinton’s campaign. [I’m Not Obsessed] So it turns out the “Shaman” who blessed Paris Hilton in public is actually an actor whose body of work includes Mutant Vampire...

Christina Aguilera is apparently furious that People magazine is paying Jennifer Lopez up to six million dollars for her twin trolls, while no one cared enough to see her own baby-that-looks-exactly-like-other-babies: Singer Christina Aguilera is reportedly furious over Jennifer...

Ever wonder what Jessica Alba would look like crossed with Christina Aguilera? No? Well, sucks for you, because here she is. Meet “Jesstina Albaguilera.” [Ed. note: Ooo! Potential baby name, J-Lo?] She has an amazing voice, looks great in...

Jimmy Kimmel is fucking Ben Affleck. We haven’t witnessed it firsthand, but we slapped a hot dog against a slab of olive loaf and it’s pretty much the same thing. [YouTube] Hot new couple alert! Jessica Alba ♥ Cameron...

Christina Aguilera and her newborn boobs went on “Ellen” (not literally) to talk about baby Max, penis balloons, and her new house. We had to watch this video about seven times to get all that, because we kept getting...

Christina Aguilera scheduled a C-section because she was afraid of vaginal tearing. We’re more afraid of our vagina becoming cognizant and whistling “Freebird” while we’re in line at the post office. But we suspect that’s just us. [dlisted] Christina’s...

Christina Aguilera appears on the latest cover of People magazine, along with newborn son, Max Liron. The article ment- Oh, wait. Sorry. One of our ovaries just jumped out the fucking window because it couldn’t take anymore of these...

Nicole Richie, who gave birth to a daughter recently, was apparently a favorite among nurses and patients at Cedars-Sinai Medical Center in L.A. Christina Aguilera, on the other hand, was like a ginormous, sour orange: There’s no doubt about...

With all the talk surrounding Jennifer Lopez, we forgot that Christina Aguilera’s given birth to some twins of her own. She even took them with her to vote. [dlisted] Pago Pago goes gaga for Hillary. [Politico] Is Morrissey even...

Singer and new mom Christina Aguilera is having a tough time selling photographs of her new son, Max, to magazine. We’re guessing he came out like his dad: Don’t expect to see a photo of Christina Aguilera’s baby on...

Forbes magazine came out with a list of the top-grossing female artists of 2007 and, curiously, our name is nowhere to be seen. But some other Latinas are there. Maybe you recognize their names?: 1. Madonna - $72 million...

In news that should surprise absolutely no one, singer Christina Aguilera gave birth to her son while in full hair and make-up. “Reports” Star Magazine: A source tells Star that the glam singer, who arrived at Cedars-Sinai Medical Center...

Christina Aguilera and Nicole Escovedo Richie are both at Cedars Sinai in Los Angeles at this very moment, about to have their babies cut out of their strangely orange, slightly phosphorescent bodies. Because you know those chicken heads are...

Singer Christina Aguilera and Tom Cruise’s wife Kat(i)e Holmes will co-star in Humboldt Park, a family drama, with John Leguizamo and Freddy Rodriguez rounding out the cast: The filming of family drama Humboldt Park begins next month - just...

Having an occupied womb makes Jessica Alba shy and grumpy. However, it’s still no excuse for wearing a velour tracksuit. [Drunken Stepfather] Jennifer Lopez has a big, puffy face to go with her big, puffy talent. [msnbc] Fergie is...

Singer Christina Aguilera is the cover girl for the January issue of Marie Claire, proving nothing is sexier than a parasitic life form lying in wait within an engorged uterus. Says Aguilera of her spermination: “We were planning on...

Now that Jennifer Lopez is undoubtedly sperminated, let’s focus back on Christina Aguilera. Homegirl has been neglected lately. And why? Is her womb not equally occupied? Does her skin not also resemble a delicious piece of citrus? Is her...

• A very scary man analyzes Penelope Cruz’s cousin’s boobs. [Drunken Stepfather] • Cycle nine (what happened to seasons?) of “America’s Next Top Model” premieres tonight and we don’t see any Latinas on the roster. Guess we’re out of...

• Wrong in the name of all that is holy: Picklesickles are coming. [Austin-American Statesman, Picklesickle MySpace] • Penelope Cruz steals Bono, replaces him with Robin Williams. [Allie Is Wired] • Christina Aguilera canceled some shows because she’s sick,...

• Christina Aguilera’s voluptuous, possibly-milk-engorged, Latina boobs overtake China. [TMZ] • Taco Bell reminds us of the ugly girl in high school who uses her dad’s credit cards to buy popular friends she secretly thinks are bitches. [TMZ] •...