In a recent interview with People en Español itself, Elvis gleefully and maliciously promised to pose naked were he selected to be included on the list. Noooooooooo.
30 June 2009
Elvis Crespo Promised To Pose Naked If Chosen As One Of People En Español’s Más Bellos And They Chose Him Anyway
By Alex Alvarez at 5:30 PM.
23 April 2009
SeaWorld To Celebrate Latino Culture By Inviting Elvis Crespo. Esplash!
By Alex Alvarez at 4:48 PM.
SeaWorld San Diego will be celebrating Latino culture from April 25 through May 17 by hosting an array of Latin music stars… including everyone’s favorite salty seaman, Elvis Crespo.
20 April 2009
Elvis Crespo’s Number One And Only Fan Will Appear In His UpCOMING Video
By Alex Alvarez at 6:07 PM.
Handsy singer Elvis Crespo’s number one fan - an adorable human Pikachu who calls himself “El Chulillo” - was pero lyk super excited to speak to his idol today as Crespo appeared on Escandalo TV. You may remember the Chulster from his comedic video defending Elvis. He’s kind of amazing, and not only because he matches [...]
10 April 2009
Elvis Crespo Gets Off! Again!
By Cindy Casares at 1:00 PM.
The feds have decided not to press charges against Elvis Crespo for allegedly masturbating on a flight from Houston to Miami last month, but Patricia Parea, the witness who reported Crespo, is not giving up so easily!
Stuff This In Your Easter Basket: Elvis Crespo “Suavemente” Hand Cream
By Alex Alvarez at 9:00 AM.
At a loss for what to add to your Easter basket this year? Tired of the same old chocolate bunnies and jellybeans? Bueno, friends, have we got a suggestion for you: Luxurious, extra creamy, nutritious Suavemente® hand cream. Internationally acclaimed performer Elvis Crespo gives it three thumbs up!
7 April 2009
New Elvis Crespo “Pinga” Video
By Cindy Casares at 1:45 PM.
The Elvis Crespo Masturgate parodies are beginning to roll in and this one, by the dubiously titled Mariconson.com, is pretty funny towards the end. We love how Elvis’ defense is that he didn’t even get to finish.
2 April 2009
Chris Crocker–Elvis Crespo Version
By Cindy Casares at 4:00 PM.
If you’ve been following the Elvis Crespo Masturgate scandal, you’ll love this Chris Crocker spoof on his behalf. Assuming you’ve seen the original. Created by the people behind YouTube channel ChulilloLately, it features spot-on eyeliner as well as convenient English subtitles.
31 March 2009
But What Does The Entertainment World Think Of Elvis Crespo Masturbating?
By Cindy Casares at 7:00 PM.
Milking Elvis Crespo’s snake on a plane for all it’s worth, Univision asked the stars at Premio Lo Nuestro how they felt about Elvis getting caught masturbating. Sound bites range from the demure, “No comment,” to the brazen “Everybody does it. More power to you, bro.” Well, we won’t be sitting next to any Norteño bands on [...]
30 March 2009
Elvis Crespo Not White Enough For Jimmy Fallon To Make Fun Of
By Cindy Casares at 5:00 PM.
Proving we are in desperate need of George Lopez’s new late night talk show, Jimmy Fallon totally botched his opportunity to make a great joke about Elvis Crespo’s Masturgate scandal the other night by being grossly unaware of the jokes on his own telemprompter.
27 March 2009
Elvis Crespo MySpace Video Denies Getting Detained, But Not Masturbating
By Cindy Casares at 4:39 PM.
As promised, Elvis Crespo has posted on his MySpace page a video statement regarding the recent allegations that he masturbated during a flight from Houston to Miami last week. And, as expected, he’s sidestepping everything.
Elvis Crespo Cornered On The Premio Lo Nuestro Red Carpet By El Gordo, Sinvergüenza!
By Cindy Casares at 1:40 AM.
Boy, oh boy, now we know where Raúl De Molina gets his nickname Gordo and it’s not from his fat stomach. It’s from his GIANT BALLS. He totes cornered Elvis Crespo on the red carpet at Premio Lo Nuestro and screamed at him, “¡Que tu estabas pensando?!”
26 March 2009
Elvis Crespo Began Masturbating 15 Minutes After The Flight Took Off
By Cindy Casares at 9:07 AM.
The Associated Press is now following the important federal case of Elvis Crespo masturbating in U.S. air space and they say he started masturbating fifteen minutes after his Continental flight from Houston to Miami took off. Dayum, horniado.
25 March 2009
Redhanded: Celebrities Caught Masturbating
By Cindy Casares at 5:43 PM.
Elvis Crespo Caught Masturbating On An Airplane, Suavemente, Of Course
By Cindy Casares at 2:30 PM.
Androgynous Puerto Rican singer Elvis Crespo was in the middle of a flight from Houston to Miami when he decided, fuck the peanuts, I want dees nuts and started masturbating right there in his seat. The lady seated next to him told and, when he landed in Miami, he was detained by the FBI. Imagine [...]
