We love you, Spaghetti Cat. Jessica Simpson is hawking vitamin-enriched beer. That lucrative deal with the Home Shopping Network’s singing holiday cardigans is just around the corner, Jess. [Dallas News] Tila Tequila’s girlfriend and Lindsay Lohan’s ex, Courtenay Semel,...

Media mogul Nduka Obaigbena is going to save Nigeria by partying with celebrities. Well, that certainly worked for Darfur. [NYT] Tony Romo serenaded Jessica Simpson on her birthday. Let’s leave the singing to the professionals, kids. Like Ashlee Simpson....

Jessica Simpson’s father did not fit her for her first training bra. It was, like. Her second or third. [K-Frog] Now Amy Winehouse’s father is saying she doesn’t have tuberculosis, but emphysema. Show off. [Daily Mail] “How I Met...

Jessica Simpson wore a dumb, sexist T-shirt the other day and PETA decided to go on a dumb, sexist diatribe against her for wearing it. Full disclosure: We’re not the healthiest eater in the world, true. But, for whatever...

Gawker is asking you to come up with a new racial slur for white folks. We were going to submit “tasty fetish object riding a tractor in overalls and nothing else, calling us a ‘Mama’ in a Southern drawl...

More details continue to come out regarding the royal cacafest that is Tony Romo and Jessica Simpson’s relationship. We already knew that Papa Joe’s gigantic cara de papa was behind it, but now we’re learning the extent his creepiness...

Lily Allen blah-blah-blahgged about acting a straight up drunken fool at the “Glamour Awards.” [Lily’s MySpace] That said, we would make a baby with her dress. Present? [AOL] Johnny Depp has invited Lindsay Lohan to “Fuck Off Island.” Honey,...

What’s more fun than dating someone who’s been pretty public about wanting to get away from your ass? Having your dad push him away by being creepy! Or dating someone who makes you wear a Nixon mask and tutu...

Poor Jessica Simpson. Not only did she have to watch heryounger sister marry that fungal infection known as Pete Wentz (totes jeals!), but while Ashlee was off playing Spin the Bottle during her honeymoon, Jessica had to vacation with...

Mariah Carey might have a second wedding. Because her first one didn’t include a flying purple unicorn. [The Scoop] Any Winehouse got roses for her first wedding anniversary. Made of crack. [dlisted] Jessica Simpson looked “subdued” during sister Ashlee’s...

Ashlee Simpson and Pete Wentz and their hair irons were married this past Saturday in Los Angeles in what seems to be the most awkward wedding ceremony ever: Simpson, 23, wore an ivory lace wedding gown by Monique Lhuillier...

Tony Romo still insists that he did, in fact, dump Jessica Simpson like a massive turd after a big dinner at Tony Roma’s, despite her people’s insistence that the two are still together. A purported friend of Tony’s says...

Machochip is all excited about the recent rumors that Tony Romo and Jessica Simpson have split up, because that means Tony can play for the Dallas Cowboys without some large, gaping mouth hollering nonsense from the bleachers and distracting...

Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt might get their own “Newlyweds”-type reality series on MTV. We can’t wait to see what Heidi is going to wear on “Divorce Court.” [Page Six] Speaking of boring newlyweds, Beyonce and Jay-Z recently got...

Good ol’ Brit Bits. Hello darkness, my old friend. I’ve come to talk with you again. [WWTDD] Jessica Simpson learned nothing from the flaming bag of shit on the doorstep of pop culture that was “Newlyweds: Nick and Jessica.”...

Have you ever wondered what would happen if you placed Jessica Alba and Hillary Duff together in a blender? How ‘bout Jennifer Lopez and Angelina Jolie? Like, all the time, right? We understand. Thankfully, there’s a site to help...

Down-low Latino Tony Romo is having a hard time shaking Jessica Simpson. We have a hard time battling a craving for ribs every time we read homeboy’s name: According to OK! magazine, Tony though the couple should downshift their...

We normally try to stay the hell away from sports unless it involves shirtless pictures of David Beckham (you’re welcome), but lately sports are treading dangerously close to our territory now that Dallas Cowboys quarterback Tony Romo has decided...