No one likes Italian Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi, which is likely one of many reasons he has to pay women to pretend they want to touch him, another reason being that he hates women in general. Also? Black people.
20 October 2009
29 September 2009
Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi Fascinated By Barack And Michelle Obama’s Tans, Breasts
By Alex Alvarez at 11:01 AM.
19 August 2009
Michelle Obama’s Mother: Santera
By Alex Alvarez at 5:53 PM.
If you ever wondered what First Grandma Marian Robinson, Michelle Obama’s mother, and Yanixan have in common, well. Wonder no more: They both, unlike Bradley Nowell, practice Santeria.
15 June 2009
GOP Rusty Depass Called Michelle Obama A Gorilla On His Facebook Page
By Cindy Casares at 12:00 PM.
We love a good, racialiscious scandal here at Guanabee, so when the first lady, who happens to be a black, gets called, in so many words, a gorilla, it makes the little hairs inside our nostrils stand on end in anticipation of the media shitstorm to follow.
21 May 2009
7 May 2009
4 May 2009
Michelle Obama Celebrates Cinco De Mayo - Just Like Us!
By Alex Alvarez at 4:30 PM.
Let’s peruse these rather enjoyable pictures of Michelle being cute as she celebrates Cinco de Mayo with young students from Latin American Montessori Bilingual Charter School and Next Step Charter School
2 May 2009
2 April 2009
Michelle Obama Touches Queen, Causes Media To Panic
By Camilla Rowan at 5:30 PM.
During one of the Obamas’ formal meetings with Queen Elizabeth II, Michelle Obama happened to gently pat the Queen on her shoulder after a photo-op. Since touching the Queen is traditionally just not done, no one is sure what to make of it, so of course the response has been an avalanche of snotty [...]
26 March 2009
Bill Richardson Spotted By Michelle Obama In Soup Kitchen
By Cindy Casares at 11:15 AM.
This morning’s New York Times Styles section, features first lady Michelle Obama bumping into Bill Richardson, down on his luck in a Washington, D.C. soup kitchen.
11 March 2009
Happy Birthday Ivy Queen! Drop The Birthday Cake And Get Healthy With Michelle Obama, Why Don’t You?
By Alex Alvarez at 4:30 PM.
March 4th marked our BFF Ivy Queen’s 65th 37th birthday and, when “Escandalo TV” asked how she kept such a youthful and well-preserved figure, Ivy explained she did it by complimenting herself, never working out, and eating fattening foods. Michelle Obama does not approve.
9 March 2009
Designer Maria Pinto Has Saved Michelle Obama From Shiny Prom Dress Nightmares, Herself
By Alex Alvarez at 6:02 PM.
Chicago-based designer Maria Pinto is once again being heralded by the press for her work in dressing First Lady Michelle Obama. And, judging from Michelle’s choice in prom dress (see below), we think Maria deserves all the praise she can get…
6 March 2009
Michelle Obama And Oprah’s O Magazine Cover Shoot Disrupted By Unexpected Guest
By Alex Alvarez at 5:30 PM.
The upcoming issue of Oprah’s O Magazine, on newsstands March 17th, will feature First Lady Michelle Obama as the co-cover model with Oprah. The two ladies look happy and serene on the finished cover, but Guanabee has exclusive, behind-the-scenes info about a disturbance that took place during the shoot. Apparently, an unexpected guest showed up and [...]
11 February 2009
Michelle Obama In Vogue
By Alex Alvarez at 12:45 PM.
First Lady Michelle Obama appears on the March cover of American Vogue in a dress she picked herself. The dress featured on the cover shot is by Jason Wu, the man responsible for the giant cupcake Michelle wore to the inaugural ball. Fancy that!
The decision to abstain from being styled or lent clothes by a [...]
5 February 2009
Audio: Etta James Disses The Shit Out Of Beyonce And Barack Obama
By Cindy Casares at 6:45 PM.
Sometimes old people are sad. Like when Etta James, who is legendary and awesome and untouchable, goes and acts unabashedly jealous of a child, i.e. Beyonce, for singing “her” song “At Last” at one of the many inaugural balls we all suffered through last month. “At Last,” was actually written in 1941 by Mack Gordon [...]
23 January 2009
Guanabee Goes To The Ball
By Camilla Rowan at 4:51 PM.
Contributing editor Camilla Rowan had the chance to attend one of the many inaugural balls meant to show America what an awkward dancer our new president happens to be. Join her as she boozily traipses down memory lane. There might be a mini-cupcake or romp beneath the bleachers in it for you.
