Celebrities are looked to as a means of gauging what’s in style, as they have access to designer clothing that the rest of us can only either dream of or write about derisively for work. So why not turn to celebrities (and we use this term loosely) to show us plebes what to avoid this Halloween?
26 October 2009
Celebrities Show Us The Top Five Things To Keep In Mind When Selecting Your Halloween Costume
By Alex Alvarez at 10:58 AM.
23 October 2009
Perez Hilton Has “Full Circle” (Of Latino Hell) Moment Dancing “Conga” With Gloria Estefan And Mom
By Cindy Casares at 10:58 AM.
Perez + Gloria Estefan + Las Vegas = Latino Circle Of Hell.
15 September 2009
10 September 2009
9 September 2009
Santa Tyra Banks Convinces Perez Hilton To Be Nice. Ish.
By Alex Alvarez at 11:21 AM.
Tyra Banks, tireless champion of Tyra Banks, interviewed Perez Hilton for the season premiere of The Tyra Banks Show Starring Tyra Banks, Featuring Tyra Banks. She got him to stop writing mean things about slutty babies!
4 September 2009
Perez Hilton Picks On Tallulah Willis
By Alex Alvarez at 9:42 AM.
It was not only Perez Hilton’s pleasure, but his duty to inform us that 15-year-old Tallulah Willis, daughter of Bruce and Demi, is a slut. His impressive display of investigative journalism has incurred the wrath of Demi Moore. TWITTER WAR!
12 August 2009
Perez Hilton’s Cocoperez Women’s Site: Awesome Idea For Fat Sluts, Gay Bitches, Etc.
By Alex Alvarez at 3:17 PM.
You have no idea how excited we are for the launch of Perez Hilton’s new “women-friendly” site, Cocoperez. Based on our extensive knowledge of Perez’s current site, we take it the new site will be friendly to women in the vein of things like episiotomies.
10 August 2009
Beyond The Bullshit: Perez Hilton To Launch Women’s Site & Music Tour, Make Large-Headed Baby With LA Times
By Alex Alvarez at 12:09 PM.
The LA Times has featured an in-depth article on gossip blogger Perez Hilton. In-depth as in “flailing in the center of a wading pool.”
17 July 2009
Introducing The Scribe Behind Perez Hilton, Barbara Lavandeira
By Alex Alvarez at 4:01 PM.
So we’ve been doing a little internet sleuthing and we think we’ve stumbled upon a picture of Perez Hilton’s sister, Barbara Lavandeira. You can tell because she and Perez pretty much share a face.
Perez Hilton Confirms He Doesn’t Write His Blog Alone Anymore (Or At All, Probably)
By Cindy Casares at 3:06 PM.
That handwriting analyst we talked to about Perez Hilton’s site was right: Perez isn’t the only one drawing cum stains on Robert Pattinson’s face. Perez admitted in legal court documents that his sister Barbara is writing on PerezHilton.
8 July 2009
Perez Hilton, Bigger Man: Perez Writes About Will.i.am’s Plagiarism Charge
By Alex Alvarez at 2:13 PM.
6 July 2009
And In Other Perez Hilton News: The Advocate Advocates For Perezito
By Alex Alvarez at 6:15 PM.
. In their cover story on the Queef of all Mierda, The Advocate pretty much confirms our suspicions about Perez’s attitude towards black people.
Why Is Perez Hilton So Annoying? No, Really. We Will Attempt To Figure This Out.
By Alex Alvarez at 3:42 PM.
Perez Hilton was recently and inexplicably featured on MTV Iggy as cameras followed him - and a mostly silent Margaret Cho - into his closet. Haha, get it?! Because he likes men, in a highly theoretical sense.
27 June 2009
Perez Hilton Is A Friend To Gay Men Everywhere. (Still Hates Women.)
By Alex Alvarez at 11:55 AM.
As we know, all women have to either agree with him or be a robot from space in order to get on Perez’s good side.
26 June 2009
How Latinos Are Reacting To Michael Jackson’s Death
By Alex Alvarez at 2:30 PM.
People from all over the world, famous and otherwise, are issuing forth their response to Michael Jackson’s death. Let’s take a look at how his passing is impacting the Latino community while we wait for Mark Sanford to come bearing love letters.
The Matthew Shepard Foundation Rejects Perez Hilton’s Offer Of A Donation
By Alex Alvarez at 11:42 AM.
25 June 2009
Perez Hilton, Gay Warrior, Will Not Allow You To Out Ricky Martin
By Alex Alvarez at 2:30 PM.
Hay! Not so fast guys! Perez Hilton has reported that TV Aqui magazine is “shady, shady” for having misquoted a statement by Ricky Martin to make it seem as if he was coming out as gay or bisexual.
Perez Hilton Thinks Ricky Martin Is Pretty Gay
By Alex Alvarez at 1:36 PM.
Perez Hilton Again With The Apologies
By Cindy Casares at 9:00 AM.
Perez Hilton was sensing that his fifteen minutes are up with this Black Eyed Pea thing after everyone fell in love with the much more interesting story of Governor Mark Sanford fucking an Argentinean, so he wrote us a letter. It’s called “I’m Sorry.”
